When Karl Marx said, “History repeats itself, first as tragedy, second as farce”, probably he didn’t realize the 21st century truth. Had he known the reality of 21st century, he might have as well said, “History repeats itself, first as tragedy, and then as comedy every time after that time after time to make us roll out on the floor with laughter”. I blame, err… give social media the full credit for making a non-issue into one, that too at the national level. And for getting a guy to prominence which neither he nor his political outfit deserved. It would have totally gone unnoticed by me had it not happened that about a dozen friends of mine shared some YouTube clippings on their Facebook profiles. I would never have gotten to hear one of the humorous speeches that would have given even top late night stars like Jay Leno a run for their money. Had I stopped at listening to just the clippings or had I not known the background of the speaker or his party or the life of an average Hyderabadi, I am sure I too would have reacted the same way – shock and dismay. I read the way some prominent national level journalists have responded in their editorials. I wish I could present them with a CD of ‘Angrez’ because it had a character of ‘Salim Pheku’ in it which is what I would compare this speech with.
When I heard about the jingoism and as one of a trainer friend of mine used to say ‘thigh beating’ for the first time, (and that was when I heard THE speech in bits and pieces I should admit), the first thought that crossed my mind was that of a Déjà vu. It took me back to my childhood days when I was as curious as I am now and asked my dad about an old structure bang opposite our family home at Kothapet. He told me that it was a ‘burj’ that was of great help during my grandpa’s times. And when I prodded more, he said that it was from the top of that ‘burj’ that villagers of Kothapet (someone from our family was the ‘Mali Patel’ of Kothapet, my dad was the last ‘Mali Patel’ of Kothapet until N T Rama Rao abolished that post)used to keep an eye for the ‘Razakars’ and to protect the village from those Razakars. I was curious as to whom on earth were those! I left it at that, but, kept it for another day. Later, I asked this question again, but, this time, when my dad was sitting with one of his friends. That friend happened to be the ‘Mali Patel’ of Singur, the town which is the source of Manjira water for the twin cities of Hyderabad Secunderabad. He was kind enough to tell me in detail what/who the Razakars were. Razakars were the private militia with a vowed to lay down their life for the leader (read Nizam) and the party (Majlis-e-Ittehadul-Muslimeen) and would fight to the last to maintain the Muslim hegemony in the State of Hyderabad and were working under the leadership of Qasim Razvi. It is this Qasim Razvi who is the ‘tragedy’ of my post. He was from the times of the last Nizam’s rule and was a practicing lawyer in Osmanabad who got a bit too much carried away and was the Frankenstein monster that the Nizam himself has created. Here I would want to share what I know about this original ‘Sher-e-Deccan’. Qasim had his roots from UP and has moved to the Hyderabad state in search of greener pastures. This lunatic had a dream of unfurling the Nizam’s flag on the Red Fort, New Delhi. I couldn’t believe this when I learnt it first, but, based on my research, I now know that it indeed was a fact and there are quotes attributed to him. Qasim was a prominent face of ‘Majlis-e-Ittehadul-Muslimeen’ (this MIM is the mother of the current day AIMIM, detailed story later in this post) and went on to be the last president of ‘the King’s party’. The original Sher-e-Deccan didn’t just stop at saying that he “would plant the Asaf Jahi flag on the Red Fort in Delhi” (yes, in his dreams! Red Fort is waiting for that!).
He also said:
- “There is a need for the banks of Musi and Jamuna to converge”
Aah... I wish that happened. I still wish that would happen, in my life time. Rivers should be nationalized and linked to avoid irrigation and drinking water issues
- “The day is not far off when the waves of the Bay of Bengal will be washing the feet of our sovereign” (remember that the Hyderabad state was a land-locked princely state with allegiance to the British crown)
Not sure if he had a plan to submerge the coastal areas so as to get Bay of Bengal to come till Nalgonda or Khammam. I wish there was some documentation on the ‘stuff’ he was ‘high’ on and which made him hallucinate to this extent
- "It is constantly being said for the last six months that Hyderabad would be attacked. The Indian Union cannot attack Hyderabad for another 600 years. If she does, she would destroy herself... The day Hyderabad is attacked I would not be responsible for the safety of the Red fort. A fire would spread in every direction"
With the advantage of hindsight, I can say that it took exactly 6 days (from 13th September to 18th September, 1948 and it didn’t need 600 years. And yes, there were fireworks and not fire in all directions
- "If Hyderabad's fate would be that of Junagadh then Red Fort's fate would be worse."
Not many people remember what Junagadh is, but, they sure do know what Hyderabad is
- “Death with the sword in hand, is always preferable to execution by a mere stroke of the pen” boasted the MIM head and ‘Sher-e-Deccan’ when Nizam was advised to sign the instrument of accession by some of his advisor
- Again, with the advantage of hindsight, I can say that after all the boastings and verbal diarrhea he didn’t practice what he preached
- But the topping on the ice is what he said when he went to New Delhi post 1947 in an attempt to ‘threaten’ the Union Government. It was a dud, as expected, and he is quoted to have told the ‘Sardar’ of Bardoli “…if Government of India insisted on a plebiscite, the final arbiter could only be the sword”. Though it is not documented, I am pretty sure that the Iron Man of India would have laughed at this statement at Qasim’s face.
It is this kind of talk that invited/expedited the ‘Police Action’ though I do not want to sound in any way undermining the atrocities committed by the Razakars on the citizens of the Hyderabad state. Loot, arson, terror and murder – these have started to replace peace, tranquility and justice for the people of Hyderabad. I have seen a sense of fear in the eyes of people who faced the wrath of Razakars in the almost one year prior to Operation ‘Polo’. The biggest slap on the face of the father of Razakar movement came from none other than the Nizam himself for whom this militia came into existence. In his first (and last) radio broadcast indicating the surrender of Nizam’s state to Indian union where the Nizam said “In November last, a small group which had organized a quasi-military organization surrounded the homes of my Prime Minister, the Nawab of Chhatari, in whose wisdom I had complete confidence, and of Sir Walter Monkton, my constitutional Adviser, by duress compelled the Nawab and other trusted ministers to resign and forced the Laik Ali Ministry on me. This group headed by Qasim Razvi had no stake in the country or any record of service behind it. By methods reminiscent of Hitler-ite Germany it took possession of the State, spread terror… and rendered me completely helpless.”
At around 4PM on 18th September, 1948 when the Nizam’s army headed by an Arab Gen El Edroos surrendered to Major Gen J N Chaudhari, there was no trace of the ‘tigers’ a.k.a. Razakars anywhere around. India’s fate and that of the Red Fort were better than ever and will remain so even after Hyderabad’s fate was exactly the same as that of Junagadh. There was no ‘fire’ that spread in ‘all directions’, just fireworks of jubilation in Hyderabad. Musi never met Jamuna and nor did the warm waters of the Bay of Bengal wash the feet of Nizam who was sitting in the King Koti palace at that time. The ‘king’s party’, MIM was dismantled and banned. The ‘Sher’ has been tamed, tried and sentenced to a seven year rigorous imprisonment for the atrocities committed. He served the sentence partly in Chanchalguda prison and partly in Pune’s Yerwada prison (in the news recently because it was where Pakistani Kasab was executed). When he finished his term he was released with a condition that he would leave Hyderabad (and also India) in 1957. He came to Hyderabad for a day or two to pack his bags and summoned MIM leadership (or whatever was left of it). He wanted to migrate to Pakistan and wanted to hand over MIM. Of the 140 odd members, hardly 40 came to the meeting and no one was ready to take up the mantle of the dissolved/banned party. Qasim was desperate and it is told that he was ready to hand over the ‘reigns’ to any Muslim over 12 years. At the end Wahaab Owaisi took over the ‘party’ and it was renamed as ‘All India Majlis-e-Ittehadul-Muslimeen’ (AIMIM) which still exists as a political party confined to the twin cities. Qasim Razvi migrated to Pakistan where he lived (and died) a non-existential life quite opposite to the ‘Sher-e-Deccan’ life of his Hyderabad times.
This was about the ‘tragedy’ (taking a queue from good old Marx). I say that this is a tragedy because Qasim Razvi’s life and acts resulted in a lot of pain, deaths, duress, and a deep mark and created a divide between the Hindus and Muslims which was not known or heard of until that time in Hyderabad. Qasim Razvi is nothing more than a tragedy according to me even after quoting his speeches which can be termed as anything between hilarious and was an epitome of lunatic gibberish at its best. Now I turn my post to the ‘repeated comedy’ part of all this, to the now famous speech of Nirmal. The irony of both these characters is so glaring that it cannot be missed:
- Both these 'leaders' were referred to as ‘Sher-e-Deccan’ (the song ‘Slim Shady’ runs in my head. Can the real Sher-e-Deccan, please stand up… please stand up)
- Both speeches made in and around Hyderabad, my birth place, a place which I always knew as a place where Hindus and Muslims (and people of all religions) lived a peaceful life
- Both these people belonged to the same political outfit, and ideology
Coming to the neo Sher-e-Deccan, Akbaruddin Owaisi, he is supposed to be the ‘fire brand’ of his political outfit, AIMIM. I feel that his speeches and style can be compared with a Raj Thackeray of MNS. This Owaisi is the grand son of the Wahaab Owaisi who took over the reigns of the banned outfit MIM from Qasim Razvi. AIMIM is a strong force in the old city areas of Hyderabad. Akbar strikes a chord with the younger generation of AIMIM supporters, predominantly Muslims thanks to his mostly inflammatory speeches. I have listened to the full speech of this ‘neo Sher’ that he delivered at Nirmal and the one that has become very famous with millions of clicks/views on YouTube. I am not interested in going into the anti Hindu utterances by him in that speech. He is neither competent nor capable of talking about any religion, let alone his own religion. Hinduism or for that matter any religion is so magnanimous that it has seen many a Owaisi come and go in sands of time and they cannot be tarnished by such utterances. However, I pick four ‘gems’ from that speech which are worth discussing:
i. “hum gaye to khaali haath nahi jaayenge taj ko le jayenge, laal quila ko le jayenge, aur qutub minar ko le jayenge” – “if we are made to leave (India), we wont go empty handed, we will take the Taj, the Red Fort and the Qutab Minar along with us”
I am not sure that the learned MLA is in knowledge of reality that it is India that is home to the second largest Muslim population on earth, second only to Indonesia and that no one has (and I am sure will never) ask any person from any religion to leave India. India has never agreed the ‘Two Nation Theory’, fortunately so. And our constitution in its preamble declares India as a ‘Socialist, Secular, Democratic Republic’ and the fundamental rights of the land bestow upon its people to freely practice any religion without fear. If these facts are known to the ‘neo Sher’, he wouldn’t have thought or imagined or hallucinated that someone is asking Muslims to leave India. Muslims and Hindus (and all the people belonging to all other religions) are the assets of this land, if a Hindu Dr Rajaramanna was heading Pokran I, then; it was a Muslim Dr Abdul Kalam who was heading Pokran II. They never thought of getting things to India, not of taking things away
ii. “Arre Hindustan, hum 25 karor hai na, tum 100 karor hai na, theek hai, tum to hamare se tine zyaada hai, theek hai, 15 min ke liye ye police ko hataalo, bataadenge kisme himmat hai, kaun taakatwar hai!” – “Oh Hindustan, we are 250 million right? You (Hindus) are a billion right? Fine. You are so larger in numbers than us right, that’s fine. Remove this police for 15 minutes and we shall show you who is brave and who is strong”
Hindustan is another name for India derived out of ‘Sindhu’/Indus (Sindhu+sthan – Hindu+sthan) and is an Urdu word. Hindustani does not just refer to Hindus but it refers to everyone who lives in this land. I never knew that India is a big ‘akhada’ where domination is the name of the game. Does he represent the entire 176 thousand odd people of Chandrayangutta constituency or just a section of it? I do not want to know his answer to this question! Remove the police? For what again? This ‘responsible’ politician is known to take law into his own hands or to threaten to do so. He threatened to behead not just P V Narasimha Rao but also Salman Rushdie and Taslima Nasreen. The actions of these three are debatable, but, taking law into your own hands? He went to the extent of slapping Taslima while she was on a visit to Hyderabad. This not just tarnished his image, but, also that of Hyderabad
iii. “muaaf karnaa, mere bhai, kasha bhi kuch hua, kahi bhi hua, to phone aata hai, 'Akbar bhai, yaha gadbad ho gaya aa jaiye. Akbar bhai aisaa ho gaya, Akbar bhai waisa ho gaya'. kasha humara bhai phone karke nahi bola ki 'Akbar bhai aisa hua, to mai aisaa kar diya'. aayinda phone aaya to bolnaa 'aisaa hua thaa, aisaa kar liye, ab Akbar bhai ab tum sambhaal lo'” – “sorry my brother, whenever something happens anywhere I get a call ‘Akbar bhai, there is an issue here, please come. Akbar bhai, this happened, something else happened’. None of my brothers have called me to say ‘Akbar bhai this happened and I retaliated in this way’. Going forward when you call me, tell me ‘Akbar bhai, this has happened, I have retaliated in this way, now please take care of us and the situation’”
I guess this is what every politician does and this is how most politicians confide in their battery of lawyers and chartered accountants. I am pretty sure that he might have said something on these similar lines when media raked up this issue and the law started to catch up with him – ‘my dear lawyers, I said this, I did this, now please save me’. I wonder that this forty plus year old guy has the strength to talk passionately (and rake up passions too) for hours together. This, he could do despite having a bullet in his abdomen (which was a result of a ‘gang war of dominance’). But when the cops called on him, he had to hide behind the fact that he has a bullet in him and he cannot sit at a place and stand the questioning. He can sit in a flight to London, but, not in a prison cell. Playing innocence and playing victim when there is evidence mounting against one is the best way to retaliate I guess
iv. “Aye Allah ka shukar hai mere saamne ye mic hai. Kal ko ye mic nahi kuch aur thamaalu, to Hindustan ke 1000 baras ki taareeq mein duniya ne utnaa khoon kharaaba nahi dekhaa hogaa jo iss mulk mein ho jaayegaa” – “Thank God that it’s a mic in front of me. Some day I might as well grab ‘something else’ and not a mic and on that day, there would be so much of bloodshed that in the thousand year history of India, the world would have never seen before”
WOW! I am still rolling on the floor laughing.
I am very clear when I say that if I do not like someone talking (or acting) bad against any other religion, caste, region or ethnicity, I do not distinguish and take a different stand if the speaker is a Hindu or a non-Hindu. I condemn any ‘anti-anything’ speech that fans animosity irrespective of it coming from anyone be it an Owaisi or a Gandhi (the ‘new’ Gandhis… I don’t want to shock the poor old man in his grave) or a Thackeray. I hold my country and its constitution in the highest of regards and take immense pride in the democratic, multi-cultural and multi-ethnic lifestyle of our land.
But, as I have mentioned in the first paragraph, both these paper tigers remind me not of any tragedy or farce as Marx has guessed, but instead as a comedy. And as I said, the first character that I can think of which closely resembles both is that of ‘Salim Pheku’ from the movie ‘Angrez’. This Salim Pheku is a quintessential looser from Hyderabad who wants to make the world believe that he is the winner and is ready to create a story to prove that he is a winner and is the best. Here is a sample why I say that:
Salim Pheku: kal Krishna oberoy mein daawat thi... daawat mein jaate, manageraan venageraan poora hallo hai bole... main bola party kidhar chalri boleto, 'BLANKET' hall mein chalri bole... (kounsi hall mein???!!!!!) BLANKET HALL yaaron... blanket hall mein aisa ghusthe hi, poore loga nachre… Mein bola apun nachenga to poore pottiyan mereku lapat jaate, to mein aisa baaju se nikal raha hoon... to do loga thaire the, jaate vaate logan se kya bolrai maalum, "arey inhe English filmon ka hero dikhra nai?"
(Ismail bhai: Abba....)
Ab mein hallu jaake table pe baitha, waiter aa ke bola "sir any thing thanda garam", ab sharab to mein peeta nai, mein ek all mix fruit juice la bolke bola... aisa baith te hi saamne se Mallika dekhli...
(Ismail bhai: Mallika??!! kaun?)
Arey 'MURDER' yaaron, baajuk leke aake boli "Hi Salim where are you, how do you do, naayudu" bolke...
Phir mereku lapatli ustaad, lapat ke idhar puppy, udhar puppy, tum samajhrai na, idhar puppy, udhar puppy mera phulnaa shuru ho gaya...
(Jahangir: kya phulnaa shuru hogaya baap Salim..?)
Arey saas phulnaa shuru hogai yaaron...
Mallika-"Salim mujhe long drive pe jaana hain"
Salim -" ab main usse Hyderabad mein long drive pe kahaa le jaoo? Aaisse banjara hill se panjagutta se sida necklace road se tank band par lete he kya boli maloom?”
Mallika-"Salim mereku ice-cream hona" bolte he to main moazzamjahi market kane roka… Arre mashoor ice-cream hain na yaaron? Wahaa paanch paanach cup ice-cream khaaye.
Ismail bhai "panch panch cup??!!!"
Salim-"arre ithe ithe cupaa the yaaron"
“khaliye baad mai bola ab to tum thande hogaye sidha usko lekar gaya Krishna oberoi tak… Ab tum jao ghar ko main bhi jaroo. Goodnight.” Toh woh kya boie maloom "Salim aab tum jaana vaana nahi aise kaise hota? Tum mere saath room ko chalo kuch bataana hai"
“Ab main kya kara woh bolri bolke room ko chalaa gaya. Ab room ku chale jaaneke baad raat bhar kya hua maloom? Nakko pucho!”
